Hard to Believe

Some things are greatly hard to believe. Things like crushes and love. One can never immediately jump on crush express and believe everything that a friend tells them. Friend meaning Bonnie. 

I love Bonnie and I trust her. I do. But I can't believe what she is saying. Believing what she is assuming is like telling myself that my whole life has been a tiny lie. Nobody so royal and so ridiculously superb person would like me! I am a first class lady but Klaus friggin' Mikaelson is a God-like creature.

How can a person ever just assume that a man like him would like you, or have a crush on you rather? I take everything for granted, but even I would never assume a thing like this. Bonnie is really out of her mind to think of something like this. Or maybe Kol has something to do with this? What is that man doing to my best friend?

Well, whatever. I can't pretend that what she said doesn't bother me, but I can't pretend to believe that it is true either. However, in between those true facts, I can't make myself not fall in love with the possibility of Klaus having a liking to me. What if it could be more than just a crush?

Her Fantasies

Lately, I've been having silly thoughts and dreams about the king himself. Not sexual fantasies, but they might as well have been. These thoughts have been keeping me up all night that I didn't even want to fall asleep. They were nightmares.

Given that Klaus really is a monster, then they were nightmares. But if he's actually that lonely danger boy I glimpsed out of him every once in a while, then they were pleasant fantasies. I mean with what I saw from the brief nudity in our encounter, he's got a couple of features to fantasize about.

But regardless, nobody knows how terrifying this is for me. Bonnie's been lying to me about her personal vendetta against Klaus and he's been keeping very quiet about it, not wanting me to have even the slightest clue.

He couldn't even admit to me his real feelings from the time that he was making that lonesome painting. Yes, it has occurred to me that it might've been personal, but I thought we were past that. Isn't he trying to woo me after all? Isn't the point of wooing is to make a person know you in the best possible view? So why is he hesitating? Unless...

Unless, he isn't wooing me. He's using me like I thought he would be from the first day I saw him. He and Kol were natural charmers. Maybe he's just putting on this show to get into my pants like I first thought he was. Getting to know a little about him has totally clouded my judgment.

But it felt all too real. His words to me about him being sad if I were ever to turn my back on him. The emotion and his tone, they were all too real. One second he's telling me that he's dangerous and that I would run for the hills once I find out the truth, but the next, he's telling me things like 'I fancy you'. It's really quite conflicting. And infuriating considering that I can't quite seem to figure his true intentions.

Midsummer Night's Ball

Wow. That was a huge revelation. Who would have guessed that the douche bag guy I bumped onto two nights ago is the King of the City?

Dashing and charming Klaus Mikaelson. That accent and those dimples. How could I resist?

A deep and girly part of me is truly swooned by his charms. He is so British and the talented part of him is truly drawing. However, it is not his charms that has me totally flipped. It was the sensitive side that I had witnessed. The pain in his eyes that he tried so hard to hide was interesting.

I wonder so much where it comes from and whether it was from a dark past or was it just simply part of the charms. But whatever it was, I am determined to find out.

But Bonnie. . .

She asked me to stay away. What was the point of that anyway? What is the purpose of staying away from this guy who is only dangerous because he might break my heart? Personally, I think I can handle it. I think I am smart enough not to get tangled up with his tricks. But Bonnie is my best friend. She better have some logical reasons to have warned me to stay away.

Welcome to New Orleans

Coming here has really become some kind of wake up call for me. I have been living within the corners of Mystic Falls, Virginia all my life. I haven't left, EVER! Now that I finally have, it gives me a kind of joy that I couldn't express. Though it's sad how the people around the city are.

That douche bag guy I bumped onto was so full of himself! How dare he say that I don't know him? Who is he for me to know anyway? He is no Channing Tatum for me to smolder over. Then there's this Matt thing! It's very frustrating. On one part, because I have this beautiful gown that he gave me, which I really want to wear by the way! But I shouldn't because he's not my sugar daddy! I am not a whore! Then on the other hand, I am not even interested in him that way.

Matt is adorable and he is an amazing guy, but I don't. I just don't. Why couldn't he see that? Or why couldn't anyone see that? Are the people of NOLA really that blinded by the atmosphere of this city?

Anyway, I'm just really kind of hoping that things would go better, starting with the Mikaelson's Ball. Oh dear! I hope Matt thought this through!