You know, I want nothing more but to love you and be with you for the rest of my life. And from time to time, I really feel hopeless too. I really missed you and I felt so much pain, but I just thought... this is just the beginning. In the future, I'll get to spend the rest of my life with you and it'll make this seem like child's play. It'll make it almost pointless to feel this way right now, because one day, I'll be the happiest I'll ever be, spending my life with my best friend.
It's so painful and hard to know that it's not gonna be the story. It just really hurts. I don't really know how to get by and what to do. I used to be spend my day really well, watching videos, knowing that I have you in my life. But now, as I watch these videos and not hearing from you, it just really hurts. It really hurts that one day you find this person that you really love and the next day, he's just gone from your life. For no reason at all. There wasn't a fight. Nobody had any faults, but he just disappears. I don't really know what to do.
I tried to fight. I begged you to take me back. Why can't you be strong enough for me? Why can't you fight for me? Why aren't I worth it for you? Why are you so scared of something that hasn't even happened. Please don't give up on me. I'm so selfish. I couldn't let you go. I'm so selfish I'm forcing you to be with me. I'm sorry I'm selfish. I feel broken I can't even function. I wish I had more people with me. I wish I wasn't so broken. I wish I had a little more to hold on to. I really wish I did.
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